Holiday Cheer

Lunch at my house today.

Boys: Screaming, climbing across table to hit each other, spitting, screaming some more.

Me: "Alright. That's it! You two are not going to say another word to each other. You are not going to touch each other. You are not even going to look at each other. I have had it with the two of you fighting! Is that clear?"

Boys start bawling and wailing.

I resume making lunch.

Boys: Start screaming at each other.

Me: "I told you already to stop and you didn't listen." Each boy gets swat on bottom. "No. More. Fighting."

Adam: Bursts into tears.

Me: "Adam don't start hollering. You were being mean and you disobeyed. If you wake up your sister you're going to bed without lunch."

Rowan: Starts sobbing and whining that he wants lunch.

Me: "Be quiet. You're going to wake up your sister."

Adam: "You hurt my feelings! I don't want to live with you anymore."

Me: *chuckle* "I understand. I feel like that sometimes too." I continue making lunch and boys continue crying. Rowan keeps protesting no, no, no, no to something.

Me: "Do you think we should pack your bags and find you a new place to live after lunch?"

Rowan: stops bawling and says, "Yeah. That would be great!"

Adam & I start laughing.

Me: "Don't you think you'd miss your mommy?"

Boys: "No."

Me: "Okay. when you get done eating you can pack your bags and I'll drive you to your new home with strangers. How does that sound?"

Rowan: *starts bawling* "I don't wanna pack my bags! I don't want to!"

Me: "Yup. You gotta bring your stuff to your new family's house. You don't wanna live here anymore so you hafta pack your bags."

Rowan: "I don't wanna pack my bags!"

Me: "Why?"

Rowan: "It's too hard!"


Ahhhhhh. So nice to be loved.


Did I mention the perfect bite mark Rowan has on his cheek? Yeah. Big brothers are so fun.